Monday Letter on Tuesday

Posted on March 27, 2012


Dear Monday, there just were not enough hours in the day yesterday to do everything that needed done. So, here I am, a day late and a dollar short. Dear Mosquito’s, thou art enough to drive a man crazy. As I sat and watched a whole gaggle of you dance in my headlights this morning I had very murderous thought towards thee. Dear ‘safety’ razor, I’m glad your weren’t a straight razor. I likely would have killed myself (I seriously just cut myself shaving worse than I ever had in the previous decade of shaving) It was one of those brief moments when the thought that you may have just offed yourself on accident glances fleetingly through your psyche. Dear NCCER, I passed a test for a certification today that I knew basically nothing about. Unless watching a front-end loader makes you qualified. Dear ‘everyone-who-thinks-its funny-to-stop-right-between-me-and-homer-while-we-are-trying-to-work, it really is not as amusing as you think it is. (welders, its would be the equivalent of shutting your machine off than snickering about it, carpenters, its like me kicking dirt in the hole you are trying to dig) So JUST QUIT IT. Dear BP Texas city, if you don’t kill me, you will just scare me to death. Type ‘bp texas city’ into google today, and see what all comes up. Dear alisa, you’re sick are you? Sick enough to just drink soda? Oh, you poor little dear. Dear 2002 Chrysler 300m, if you croak on me this weekend, I’m not gonna be real happy. Dear Heather, thanks for shaving <(saving, get it?) my life when I cut myself. That being said, as long as it took you to get in there, I probably would have died. Dear meatball and marinara subs for supper, I think that………

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