Monday Letter

Posted on April 9, 2012

5


Dear BP, why must you change the security guards? The people now are just plain creepy, weird and otherwise unwanted by even places like McDonald’s. Dear Rebekah, it is okay to hassle me about my goals. How is YOUR reading and memorization and decluttering and planting wheat grass and Lucy’s quilt and exercise going? AND, I’m waiting on a handwritten letter ūüėČ Dear Homer, the fact that I cannot even do ONE pushup right now I lay solely at your feet. Dear Heather, remind me when you give me a choice between (a) and (b)….that (c) – None of the above…is not an appropriate choice for me to make. Dear yard, if I spend any amount of time to make you nice you had better look like a well manicured golf green in like two weeks. Otherwise I am going to take gallons of RoundUp to you. Dear bathroom project, why are you taking so long to finish. It seems as though when I have money I have no time. When I have time, I have no money. Dear Alisa, I know we need a ‘new’ car, I can assure you however, that it will not be pink when it happens. Dear John¬†MacArthur, pick a one Bible translation to use. It makes your books an exercise in frustration at times. I can accept the fact you are not KJV only. I resent the fact that you won’t just pick ONE.¬†¬†Dear Heather, I appreciate you telling me that you could already see a difference after just three workouts. But I also don’t believe you. Dear everybodywhosehouseihavebeenat, I am sorry about the fact my car leaks all manner of fluids whenever it is stopped. I have asked it to quit doing so.

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